FAQ
Will there be introductions and how many? How does the system work? This marriage event is not meant to be a series of talks or a seminar. It is expected that those who attend will be actively looking to get married. Insha’Allah the emphasis will be on solutions and getting people together rather than simply analysing the problems.
A person who is interested in participating in the event will be asked to fill in a profile on our Marriage Event App, a link will be sent after registration and payment (usually a week before the event) and the profile will contain basic biographical information as well as space to add what you hope to offer a potential spouse and you they are looking for. Each individual is assigned a numbered badge to enable clear identification.
In order to create an environment that is consistent with Islamic principles, the format of our events is carefully managed to minimise unnecessary ‘free-mixing’ while ensuring that everyone has an opportunity to be introduced. While some Muslim marriage events have chosen to replicate Western styles of ‘speed-dating’ based on one-to-one meetings lasting 2-3 minutes, we have developed an alternative method based on a group rotation that allows for all participants to meet within initial small groups where, with the help of a group facilitator, participants are encouraged to introduce themselves and offer responses to a series of ice-breaker questions with some light-hearted questions. After introductions in small groups, the women remain seated while men are asked to move onto the next group and continue introductions and rotations until all participants have been introduced. People are encouraged to make note of anyone they are interested in speaking to further.
The second part of the event focuses on facilitating one-to-one meetings between interested parties where they are free to exchange contact details if they choose to. Friends or mahrams are strongly encouraged to attend to give moral support in the whole process. We try to arrange a minimum of 5 meetings or more subject to interest from both parties. We can not promise interest from either side and can not take blame for no interest at all.
Topics are chosen from experience, married couples, advice from Shariah Council, Ulema, marriage counselors and include personal interests, expectations, and some light-hearted matters – nothing stressful!
Participants are randomly put into groups. This is fair. The size of groups depends on the size and type of event but on average it varied around 10 with an even proportion of the sexes.
Yes it is compulsory. There are two main objectives for this event. Firstly, to openly discuss and find solutions to the problems being faced by Muslims in getting married. Secondly, to give people the opportunity to meet one another in an Islamic manner, gauge their opinions and standpoint in life before making a decision whether to meet the person for again for chat. You are either part of the problem by being selfish and not participating, or you are part of the solution by getting involved. This event is not for armchair critics and philosophers.
Shifting allows meeting of other participants and moving the men is more chivalrous.
Depending on the size of the venue, during group sessions Mahram/Friends sit either at the back of the hall or in another room. They are not allowed to contribute or participate in the group discussions as it is not their show. Previous experiences and evidences have shown they have been too noisy, obstructive and very little of benefit to the participant during the group sessions, in the name of so-called support. However they can sit in during the one-one meetings.
If they are available we will try and the reason why we bring them firstly, is to get them involved because many scholars really have very little idea about how these events work and the modern challenges of Muslims in looking for spouses and relationships. If they understand the benefits, eventually they will support such initiatives in the community and perhaps even help organise them. Secondly, if you have any questions related to marriage or general issues they may be able to answer them. Finally, Islam and marriage should not be limited to the few moments “when the ‘Mullah’ does his bit during the wedding sermon”. There is a lot more to it than that.
Put some effort into filling in your profile properly, just as you make a serious effort when writing your personal statement in job applications. It is one of the first sources from which others will learn more about you. Whilst you are not expected to write an essay, one-line answers will reflect badly on you and suggest that you can’t be bothered or are not serious. Photos are highly recommended but not mandatory, however if you have photos of yourself on Facebook, Instagram, Snapchat or the latest social media craze, and to insist not have a photo on your profile for a Muslim marriage event does not really win much favours or prospect interests.
No, because this will slow down the event and past experience has shown that a lot of unnecessary mess is created due to lack of table manners. However, only water will be available. This is not a wedding party but we hope that many weddings take place after this!
We are not a large organisation or a profit-making venture and normally hire rooms in a centre, which costs money. In order to pay for the hire charges and other related costs there will be an entrance fee, depending on the event. Given that the average costs for weddings often go into the thousands, this is very reasonable for a community based project. Think about it like this – for brothers, they are saving at least 5 trips to the “Ambala” (an Indian sweet shop), and for sisters, no cooking is required and you can meet up to 5 potential spouses under one roof. To prevent the whole “village” from attending, a maximum of two Mahrams are allowed to attend each event.
Yes but depending on the event there is usually a standard charge rate of £15 per person CASH on the day for friends and for mahrams or family members are charged at £10 per person CASH on the day.
Unfortunately many times we have found so-called accompanying friends were also looking for themselves but refused to take part in the event and by charging, we believe it will bring more seriousness to the event and fairness to real fellow participants who paid the full ticket price and made the effort to participate in full.
No, marriage is a serious issue. It is a highly recommended Sunnah of our beloved Prophet Muhammad (saw) and not to be trivialised. This is not ‘Big Brother’! How would you like it if someone was observing you. For many people coming to such events is stressful enough – they don’t need extra pressure. A piece of advice: if you are married, get involved in helping people get married, if you are not, then attend as a participant.
This is not an Islamic talk or conference – it is a marriage event where one of the main objectives is to help people find suitable spouses in an Islamic way.
Of course you can – you are more than welcome. It won’t be a room full of just hijabis or bearded guys wearing shalwars. Each event varies according to the type of people. We are here to help not judge. We would rather you participated in this event than have to meet a partner in a place of potential vice.
Wear whatever you feel most comfortable with. Although this is not an interview or a wedding, first impressions do count so it’s definitely worth making some effort.
No, this is entirely your choice.
No, but do arrive on time and as you have paid and made the effort to attend and likewise others, to maximize your opportunities and chances to meet as many participants as possible, it is advisable to stay til the end, as it takes time for participants to open up, or make an interest and complete meetings.
No, from our experiences in running a marriage service and organising marriage events we have found that a lot of time is wasted, anxiety is created and expectations are built if the person is not present. Thus we have stipulated that only if you are present at the event will your profile be displayed. There is also too much administration involved.
Any one registers and attends, we trust them. We do not have neither the resources or responsibility to carry out a GIS background check of their education, family tree and banking details. This is an exercise for the participant and their friends and family to carry out reference checking. Any one who attend has some level of interest in marriage, how serious on is left to the interested party to pursue through all means of communication. If you are happy to do so then we have no problem with this, but we take no responsibility for whatever happens afterwards. That’s why Mahrams and family members are important.
If you met someone during the event but did not take their contact details, you can contact that person through our database – All participants are automatically registered to our database and can follow up with the person of interest there.
All future events are posted on our website and you can subscribe to our mailing list for notifications. In general, you should not depend solely on marriage events. Don’t put all you eggs in one basket and try other channels like online services and apps, marriage agencies, friends, mosques and Muslim organisations.
Yes, but please bear in mind we do not have crèche facilities.
Unless the event is cancelled, there are no refunds regardless of situation i.e changed your mind not to attend or whether you found someone compatible or not. The same applies with regards to transfer of tickets/bookings. If so whatever reason, you could not attend, tickets are not transferable to any event, unless the event was cancelled.
Full instructions about the format of the event will be given on the day, however in brief; A person who is interested in participating in the event will be asked to fill in a profile on our Marriage Event App, a link will be sent after registration and payment (usually a week before the event) and the profile will contain basic biographical information as well as space to add what you hope to offer a potential spouse and you they are looking for. Each individual is assigned a numbered badge to enable clear identification. In order to create an environment that is consistent with Islamic principles, the format of our events is carefully managed to minimise unnecessary ‘free-mixing’ while ensuring that everyone has an opportunity to be introduced. While some Muslim marriage events have chosen to replicate Western styles of ‘speed-dating’ based on one-to-one meetings lasting 2-3 minutes, we have developed an alternative method based on a group rotation that allows for all participants to meet within initial small groups where, with the help of a group facilitator, participants are encouraged to introduce themselves and offer responses to a series of ice-breaker questions with some light-hearted questions. After introductions in small groups, the women remain seated while men are asked to move onto the next group and continue introductions and rotations until all participants have been introduced. People are encouraged to make note of anyone they are interested in speaking to further. The second part of the event focuses on facilitating one-to-one meetings between interested parties where they are free to exchange contact details if they choose to. Friends or mahrams are strongly encouraged to attend to give moral support in the whole process. We try to arrange a minimum of 5 meetings or more subject to interest from both parties. We can not promise interest from either side and can not take blame for no interest at all.
No audio-visual recording of any form will be permitted during the event and cameras will not be allowed.
Prayer facilities will be provided and depending on where the event is located there may also be a mosque nearby. In general, depending on the timing of the event, try to pray and make wudu before you come or try to be in a state of wudu in order to save time (but toilets and washrooms available) and general spiritual mindset. At the event, please try to make salah as quick as possible and leave tahujjud prayers or istikhara dua after the event as time is short, meetings need to be arranged and no need for public show of super-piety!
Registration and attendance of any our event means, you are automatically added to our database as well, the information (including sensitive personal information) you provide to us will be stored on our computers and servers. By using our services whether it is events or database, you are consenting to us using this information to build up a profile of interests, preferences and browsing patterns and to allow you to participate fully in the services we have to offer. Hence you will receive regular notifications of our future events and sponsored events. Should you wish to stop receiving notifications or be removed from the service, please kindly send an email after the event at info@muslimmarriageevents.com
More Information
The initiative is for all Muslims, not just “Professionals Muslims”. The Prophet (saw) was a Sheppard but married a Businesswoman, Khadija (ra) – Simple. Our focus and remit is the community and where we can add value hence, so we will respond to the needs accordingly. People have different requirements, preferences as long it is within the Islamic principles. Some events, are based on actual research and others based on past experience and the current reality of a particular community or category. Because the Muslim community is large and diverse, each at different stages of development, so our events are organised on the basis of profession, ethnicity, age group,special needs, practicing and more. This has been checked and approved by a number of scholars, academics marriage counselors and community leaders and activists and who we have consulted over the course of 15 years. This is neither racist, nor immoral, nor unislamic, nor unethical, nor unprincipled, nor unfair – ignorance in the community is widespread and it takes different strategies to achieve the same the goal – i.e. the seeking of Allah swt pleasure, through reviving a sunnah, that is marriage. The following are the main types of events we organise :
- All Muslims
- Professionals
- Practicing
- Converts
- Divorced & Widowed
- Bengali
- Arab
- African & Caribbean
- Pakistani
- Somali
- Gujarati
- Over 40s
- Over 30s
- Under 30s
- Special Needs
and many others
The initiative is for all Muslims, not just “Professionals Muslims”. The Prophet (saw) was a Sheppard but married a Businesswoman, Khadija (ra) – Simple. Our focus and remit is the community and where we can add value hence, so we will respond to the needs accordingly. People have different requirements, preferences as long it is within the Islamic principles. Some events, are based on actual research and others based on past experience and the current reality of a particular community or category. Because the Muslim community is large and diverse, each at different stages of development, so our events are organised on the basis of profession, ethnicity, age group,special needs, practicing and more. This has been checked and approved by a number of scholars, academics marriage counselors and community leaders and activists and who we have consulted over the course of 15 years. This is neither racist, nor immoral, nor unislamic, nor unethical, nor unprincipled, nor unfair – ignorance in the community is widespread and it takes different strategies to achieve the same the goal – i.e. the seeking of Allah swt pleasure, through reviving a sunnah, that is marriage. The following are the main types of events we organise :
- All Muslims
- Professionals
- Practicing
- Converts
- Divorced & Widowed
- Bengali
- Arab
- African & Caribbean
- Pakistani
- Somali
- Gujarati
- Over 40s
- Over 30s
- Under 30s
- Special Needs
and many others
Human beings from the Planet Earth, in particular, Muslims who wish to fulfil a sunnah. Depending on the target audience of the event, people come from all over the world, from all walks of life. This also affects ratio and attendance. We always aim for 50:50 ratio but generally speaking, population dynamics means that there slightly more women in the world and the Muslim community there are more educated Muslim women Professionals than men. Each event varies differently, some communities and events, men hugely outnumber women. One is always recommended to register and have tawakkallah (reliance on Allah swt) and yakeen (certainity).
As community organisation, marriage is in the heart of the community and hence this reflects our choice of venue. We hold them in community centres, schools/colleges, Islamic conferences, wherever the ummah is. Occasionally, we will hold them in hotels to reflect the cliental targeted.
As London based, most of our events are in London, however we hold regular events in the major cities across the UK and abroad. Such as Manchester, Glasgow, Birmingham, Paris, New York, Toronto and so on. Wherever there is a need and interest and demand from the community, we can arrange and hold events, preferably with a local partner.
This varies according the type of event, location. London based events are usually weekday evenings and outside of London and UK are over the weekends. All forthcoming events are listed on here.
We usually hold a minimum of 2-3 events per month except Ramadan and are of different categories and at least twice a year, an event of the same category is repeated but location, date and time might differ.
Alhamdulillah, over 100,000 people have come through the service, many introductions have been facilitated and over 7000 and more of these have resulted in marriages. Marriage is clearly a sensitive matter and is not something that can be engineered mechanically. The success of such initiatives ultimately lies with Allah. What needs to be borne in mind is that this is an opportunity, and a lot will depend on what you make of it.
